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How to deal with people who play the blame game

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How to deal with people who play the blame game

How to deal with people who play the blame game

Accepting mistakes is one of the rarest traits and is hardly found in most people. Those, who are humble and sensible, always accept their mistakes, but not everyone is down to earth and practical.

Many people perceive that accepting their mistake will make them seem inferior or lower their worth. Therefore, they start doing the easiest thing: blaming others for their unhappiness, failures and dissatisfaction in life. They are difficult people to deal with, but we come across such people every now and then and should know how to deal with them, no matter how difficult or easy going they are.

1.     Don’t take it personally

The first and foremost tip when dealing with such people is to not take their comments on a personal level. If they blame external circumstances and even external people for their failure, they are the ones at fault. Everyone is the master of their own fate and can accomplish what they really work hard for. It is very impractical to blame someone else for your own failures or misfortunes.

2.     Understand their defence mechanism

When dealing with such people, you should understand their psychology as to why they are behaving the way they are. Usually, someone who is involved in blaming external circumstances and people is trying to find justifications for the behaviours they are internally guilty for.

3.     Be polite in dealing with them

Usually, a person, who is blaming others, is going through a lot of stress and issues at once, making them doubt their self worth. Do not argue or try to judge them when they are angry as it will only worsen the situation. Be polite and ready to offer any help if they need it. Blame gaming is also a sign of depression and other disorders. When someone feels helpless and miserable about solving their issues, they eventually start blaming others.

4.     Maintaining a safe distance

It is extremely vital for your own sanity to maintain a distance with people who start blaming you and taking out their problems on you. It is not advisable to completely ignore them but it is best to keep a space and not let them interfere in your personal matters.

5.     Finally, communicate!

If nothing else seems to work and they constantly keep blaming you, which makes you feel bad about yourself, then the best way to deal with the issue is to communicate. You should clearly talk to them about the matters bothering them and in what way their lives have been affected by your behaviour or actions. The open conversation will help you in understanding their points of view better and make you understand their mindset.

No matter how close a loved one may be, some behaviours are off-putting. Unnecessarily blaming someone is one of them. If someone constantly tries to make you feel bad about yourself, no matter how close they are to you in term of family or relationships, it is better to distance yourself from them. This is because extreme closeness to them might result in a loss of self esteem and self worth, which is something you surely do not want in your life.

 

“Real power comes when we stop holding others responsible for our pain, and we take responsibility for our feelings.” ~ Melody Beattie

A Selection of Blame Game Quotes

“A man may make mistakes, but he isn’t a failure until he starts blaming someone else.” ~ John Wooden

“You are at the source of being fat, sick, tired, broke, angry, depressed, and lonely.  Stop blaming your boss, family, neighbour, lover, government, society, or God.  You are the one at the scene of the crime every time something goes wrong in your life.  Stop looking for a fall guy, a scapegoat, or an innocent bystander to pin your problems on.  Until you take ownership for your life, you will always be chasing happiness.” ~ Sean Stephenson  Get Off Your “But”
“When a man points a finger at someone else, he should remember that three of his fingers are pointing at himself.” ~ Unknown

“Real power comes when we stop holding others responsible for our pain, and we take responsibility for our feelings.” ~ Melody Beattie

“A man may fall many times, but he won’t be a failure until he says that someone pushed him.” ~ Elmer G. Letterman

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